If you have been impacted by the arrival of your adult “boomerang” child or children you might like to consider mediation. You may be an adult child(ren) and are encountering issues since returning to the family home.
Mediation is a non-judgement, impartial service. In my experience the issues which are causing such an impact on the lives of the parents and the adult children, can be easily resolved through mediation. I find that when the family members agree to sit down together in the safe environment of a mediation session the issues can be dealt with in one session, or at the most in two sessions.
I have a lot of experience in this area and I would be glad to send you details. It is an inexpensive service and the families I have worked with all agree that they got a win-win result.
It is good that so many siblings and families are attending mediation to resolve conflicts. When the parties agree to attend and agree to the ground rules it is almost guaranteed that they will reach a resolution.
There is a cost for the parties and their extended families when conflict is on-going. All of the siblings\families who successfully completed mediation with me agreed that there was a weight lifted off their shoulders when they reached agreement.
As a mediator the surprising thing is that in the vast majority of cases, only one session is required – in siblings\family conflict cases.
If you are having a lot of personal distress due to anxiety maybe you would like to attend for counselling. Your anxiety may be associated with nausea, headaches or anger. You may also find you are drinking a lot of alcohol or smoking weed to help you with anxiety. You may have been prescribed drugs to relieve your anxiety but do not want to stay on them forever. The good news is that with a few sessions you can learn techniques that will help you obtain relief from anxiety without the need for drugs. You just need to make the choice to retrain your brain and the results are so worth it.
If you are in a same-sex relation and you know that your relationship is over and you would like things to be amicably in relation to children, property, finances, pets and personal belongings you might like to consider mediation.
During mediation, parties are encouraged to discuss all of the issues and explore the various options which they have to resolve their differences.
Same sex couples who take part in Mediation are choosing to take charge of their lives. Using mediation reduces the anger associated with the break up. With mediation, the couple are able to discuss what they think is fair, and what solutions could allow them to part ways with respect and emotional closure. Mediation helps couples to keep talking until they find solutions that work for both of them. The aim of mediation is for both parties to feel they have arrived at a win-win situation.
My role as a mediator is not to take sides, not to sit in judgement, not to make decisions. The Mediation Process is based on the idea that the parties themselves are capable of arriving at a mutually acceptable resolution with the help of a Mediator.
If you would like to attend counselling and want to learn techniques to help you but are unable to leave your home to attend therapy due to:
• Agoraphobia – fear of leaving your home
• Ill-health or disability
• You are a new mum – and have problems getting a babysitter
• Or any other reason
Home Visit Counselling is available in Dublin
I use evidence-based approaches including:
• CBT – Cognitive-behaviour Therapy
• Solution-Focused Therapy
• Person-Centered Therapy
• Mindfulness – for Stress Reduction
Alternatively, you might like to avail of the SKYPE counselling sessions
Recently I was in my local garage buying petrol and the newspaper and the assistant asked me if I wanted to do the lotto. I said “I do not gamble”. I thought of those with a gambling addiction facing this every time they filled up with petrol. Unlike other European countries, every pub in Ireland seems to have a betting shop beside it. A friend told me he was in a pub – which does not have a betting shop beside it – and there was a man in the pub with a laptop taking bets. Last year, I went to the country tracing my family tree and we went into a pub for a coffee. There was a one-arm bandit machine and from the time we went in a man was feeding money into it. Us three were the only customers. Every now and then the man would get change of a €20 and keep feeding the machine. There was a rugby match on the tv which distracted us. Then a woman and a young boy entered the pub and tried to get him to leave but he would not. The young man behind the counter saw all this and when the woman and child left he gave the man change of another €20. We were so uncomfortable we had to leave.
Gambling is socially acceptable is considered harmless. Reasons for becoming a gambling addict are many – although some feel it is hereditary – although I have worked with gamblers who said no one in the family gambled. I would say – as far as they know – no one gambled – but there is a lot of secrecy in families.
It is so easy to gamble now – with online gambling – online bingo etc
Gambling fills a void – it gives a person control over one area in their live – the frightening thing is it can develop gradually – the rare winning keeps the person going
Side effects: depression – psychosomatic illness – cannot concentrate on work or on family – and in severe cases can lead to suicidal thoughts or even suicide attempts
The good news is any one with a gambling addiction can make a choice to STOP
Help is available from
http://www.gambleaware.ie 1800 753 753
or if you need one-to-one brief solution focused therapy or psychotherapy – please contact me
I had concerns about SKYPE counselling – the difference between in-person and on-screen. Would the clients on-screen feel safe to disclose? Would the therapeutic relationship/connection take place as quickly as it would in the room? I was very glad to discover that these concerns were unjustified. It is particularly useful for issues such as anxiety, depression, addiction, relationship issues and bereavement, where solution focused therapy can be used alongside conventional psychotherapy. It offers clients who live a long way from a therapist, who have time or family restraints and those from other countries an opportunity to avail of therapy. I feel very privileged to live in an era where it is possible to work as a therapist using the medium of SKYPE.
I found Gillian Isaacs Russell book Screen Relations: The Limits of Computer-Mediated Psychoanalysis and Psychotherapy very interesting. I would agree with her for the need for more research in this area.